Songs that will be played all day (in my head at least)

So this isn't a long weekend or anything, but today might just be the day I get crowned as The Score's King of Hot Wings at their Chili Rush Challenge in Jaya One, PJ.

It seems that this will either kill or soil you

Don't come..watch Hindustan on TV3's Panggung Sabtu!


Anyhoo, back to why I'm writing this.. Here's the today's list of songs you SHOULD listen to...on repeat! Why? Because fuck you, that's why..

No, I'm not offering any justification on why you should listen, just layan!



Metalingus - Alter Bridge





Santa Monica - Everclear






Say it isn't so - Gareth Gates Weezer






Rise of the Fenix - Tenacious D






Even Flow - Pearl Jam





See you!

My Shitty Day (Official Story)

Against all my wishes, I went for today's meeting with the label. Although it was fruitful to a certain extent, I might have bitten off more than I can digest.

After lunch, I took the MRR2 back to my proposed location of choice, Cyberjaya. I didn't make it back, of course..

See, about 500m before the nearest petrol station, I felt the Shits* growing. So, I decided to speed up and hurry to the toilet. I made it there, of course and I only had one option, a squatting cubicle. I rolled my pants and undies and did my business well but as I reached for the hose, yes, I wash, my pants slipped from my armpit grip and fell in the toilet bowl.

I laughed then realised that I had nothing to wear but my pink-polka-dot-motif-boxers. I panicked! In my mind raced a million thoughts and the huge hole in my boxers was as useful as a one-legged man in a football match.

Please pay attention to only the boxers

If this ever happens to you, here's what you should do:


1.  Damage Control


If it's just a small patch, wash and pretend nothing happened. However, if like me once upon a time ago, my undies got soiled, roll the damn thing and throw it away. Then go commando and enjoy the soft touches of the fabric on your skin.


What happens if the toilet is full of people knocking on your door asking you to hurry the fuck up?
Shove the son-of-a-bitch in the toilet pump thingy and please have the decency to off the tap.




2.  Do the right thing


Like what I did today, I called my boss who thankfully is my childhood friend, Mrs Violet Francis-Monterio and explained the situation:

Lett, I have something to tell you. Please don't get angry and try not to laugh

What's that?

My pants fell in the toilet bowl

(I swear she had the how-did-you-shit-that-your-pants-can-fall-into-the-bowl thought in her mind)

How can happen?

(I explained the situation)

I'll go home and change my pants then I'll come back to office

Hahahahaha..No need la..

So, I ran out of the toilet, wearing only my boxers and pants wet and rolled in my hands.

 P.S. I'll explain what Shits* mean some other time

Friday Nite LIVE

Seeing as how Blister will be rockin' it at Backyard this Friday (December 3, 2010) from 9.30pm til LATE

I've decided to pen type a few words to help YOU get accustomed to the ALL NEW Backyard's MOSH PIT!

Speaking on Mosh Pits, I've seen/been in a few 'Major 'Pits' me-self..

*Blast Off, KL, 2004

*MTV World Stage, KL, 2009

*Slash Live in KL, 2010

*The SHOUT! Awards, KL, 2010

The ONE thing all of these have in common is: Malaysians have no MOSH PIT ETIQUETTE!

So here's:

THE RULES OF THE MOSH PIT


The FIRST RULE of FIGHT CLUB the MOSH PIT is: You do not talk about FIGHT CLUB the MOSH PIT (Sorry, I got carried away)

#1 Dress Appropriately
Observe comfortable but ROCK-ish clothing at all times. 

DO NOT mosh over-aggressively with your stupid-assed-metal-clad boots and chains and spikes coming out from all the wrong places. You'll just hurt someone physically not emotionally because they see how retarded you look. 

Spiked hair is still good in my book as long as it doesn't belong to a TOTAL DOUCHE!

On the other hand, if you come to a mosh pit dressed in a suit or some preppy looking kid like Fred from Scobby-Doo or anyone from the Archie series, prepare to get taunted and ridiculed so hard, droplets of shit might fall from your eyes.

Fred Jones

Dressing up like Shaggy however, is acceptable.


#2 NO fists...NO elbows!
Nobody likes a DOUCHE throwing his/her elbows/fists into another person's rib,face, scrotum, etc. If you had a fist or two come your way, you'd probably deserve it from not paying attention to the Pit and texting another DOUCHE: 

OMFG...dis band ttly rox! XD I wish dese morons'd stp jumpin so fucken much..so annoyin! :/

If you really can't take it anymore, just pinch 'em around the inner arm. I guarantee that they will feel the pain..even though he/she has had her eyes tattooed.


#3 NO Phones/Cameras/Cameraphones
Fact: Unless the BAND asked you to record a clip, don't do it.

You are in the (mosh) pit for a reason: fully experience the energy and music thru' bouncing your bodies in a safe yet aggressive manner..

So, don't bother carrying your sweat drenched (arm)pits in the air, trying to record the WHOLE concert and at the same time getting pissed off at the few people who are trying to mosh, hence ruining your shots..because if you are the tool that's doing just that, LET LOOSE BRAH! 

You already are probably stuck in a crappy DAY job..leave the stick in the office man..put it back in your ass tomorrow..LIVE a little. What are you gonna do with the clip anyways? Boast to your equally lame friends that you were there? Put up a video on Youtube?


#4 YES to deodorant
Maths: You + 60 minutes waiting in line + 150 minutes in the Mosh Pit = SMELLY!

Just be kind to all of us..slap on some deodorant, splash a little perfume..C'mon, is that so hard to ask?


#5 Don't be a cheap-thrill..desperate guy..
Don't go round molesting people..it's not cool.
What's even more uncool-er? 
You going around looking to be molested.


Sad to say, but I've seen a few blokes dressed up tranny-like, looking ugly and shit and go around rubbing themselves over other guys. HELLS NO!


My advice to these kinda PERVS: Try crowd-surfing. That way you'll be groped and grabbed all over.

Oh and crowd-surfing starts from front to back..do it the other way and I can guarantee you..YOU WILL BE DROPPED!

 I know my shit!

Anyhoo..this is a CALL to all Rockers and Rollers to come down to Backyard Pub, TRUST ME..the pub has great atmosphere, reasonable prices, and us, Blister - Rockin' the whole damn night.

Need directions? 

Click here

Need orgasms?  

Click here 

Blister

Dear Emma

Dear Emma,

Thank you so much for dropping a line. If you also have a blog please forward me it's link, I'd love to read it and link it to mine. I guess you are doing fine... I'm responding to your comment not on a personal level nor is it meant to hit your fine country, our neighbour, Indonesia. This is just a part of the debate which I'm looking forward to continuing.

Anyhoo,

I do appreciate on the imput on some facts on the Indonesian market. You do realize that the Indonesian population is some 228 million people, which is roughly almost 10 times more then the estimated 27.5 million people. Therefore, I'd like you to analize the ratio of sales to the "market".

Of course everywhere will be talking about the volume of record sales but here, as we are speaking on local support, let us analyze on how many locals are really supporting the industry.
Even with Peter Pan's record of 3 million copies sold in Indonesia, it's actualy about only one in a million who is buying.

Their "rezeki" on being blessed with good looks or brilliant minds and making money out of it was never at question in the first place. Lets say if they had to rely solely on the music, how would they survive? I take back what I said on the reliability of the Indonesian bands on Malaysia to make them rich. My apologies there. I now agree Malaysia on it's own doesn't put food on the plate for the Indonesian bands, I'm not even questioning the Malaysian devotion towards Indonesian bands. I'm only asking my fellow Malaysians to look and love what we have.

Emma,

How would you feel if your local telco (in our case MAXIS) sponsors a stadium, theme park concert for foreign acts? Indonesian acts included...when on the other side we are struggling to get sponsors, permits, running into trouble with the cops, venues(always some hall or club) for our bands-established and upcoming to perform. Amy Search performed in Limkokwing, Butterfingers performing in Ruums soon.

Thanks Fly Fm for having the Campur Chart, but you could have banged the one year anniversary in a stadium or make it feel real Ozzfest, Woodstock like. Maybe next year...i hope!

Thanx Emma...hoping to hear from you soon.




p.s. Emma was kind enough to leave a comment clarifying some facts on my previous post Local Scene Blues

Local Scene Blues

Anyone ever heard of the band Radja? Samson maybe? The one that sings the song Kenangan Terindah? Or maybe you have heard Padi? I'm sure you've heard Dewa 19? Their song, Pupus? Kasidah Cinta? How about the band Peterpan or Sheila on 7?

Damn big names here in Malaysia rite? I mean loads of albums being sold, special concerts and awards all going to them. Give credit where its due right? So far, I have no real problems with the music they SELL (or do they call it play?). I kinda dig some of the tunes. Where are they from?

Well, this is a place to rant, and there will be some..

So...what's the real deal?

Indonesian bands here are very dominant to an extant that it overshadows our local acts. As I said, give credit where it's due, some Indonesian bands are good, but are they really as phenomenal back home in the streets of Jakarta?

The Malaysian general listener will automatically prefer music with Indonesian flavour. People actually prefer Radja and Samson and diss Spoon (not a real big fan of all 3). They play the same kind of music...and Malaysians prefer the one with Indonesian flavour. Well, here's a news flash.. Indonesian Pop/Rock bands' sales back in Indonesia are crap! They rely on us here in Malaysia to make them rich. People here worship the ground they walk on. It's ridiculous...but true.

How can this go on with radios and all blasting support your local scene. Well here's another nail in the back of the head... Have you heard Butterfingers on air? NO!! Our stations dedicate one pathetic chart a week and cramp the same old LOCAL ENGLISH bands in it! Why not let our bands mingle with the big boys of UK or the USA on air? Or are we giving our bands "preferential" treatment? Is there some kind of subliminal message saying our bands are not good enough to be played on our stations for our people to hear and enjoy (or critic..depends which side of the coin you prefer..you narcissistic b*stard..haha)

Speaking of not good enough...if lets say we had one band...local...playing the theme song for a international brand's promo...wouldn't that deserve some airtime which is not at bloody 3:45am when even the guards are asleep! Wouldn't it be cool having a band playing the theme for Nike? Well Seven Collar t-Shirt plays My Generation (not the Limp Bizkit version) and have we heard it on air? I don't think so...!

Outrage..at our local Anugerah Industri Musik, we have a special catergory for best Indonesian artiste. Do our bands get the same reception, honour there? Does the Best Malaysian Artiste Award get any recognition? NO!! Hell, I have reason to belive that our records are discarded over there.

Astro...what have you been doing all these years? Of all who won in reality music contests in Astro, Mawi is the only one seriously making it big...the arguement of whether he can sing or not, I wont discuss here. Is it the company policy to promote the wrong people? Of six Akademi Fantasias and three Blast Offs, I don't see anyone carrying their name without the tag "AF' behind their name besides Vince..You've got Khai AF, Adam AF, what the hell?

On that same note, how is pur local scene going to grow? Until when are our music going to be rated second class compared to Indonesia? Are we supposed to launch our songs outside of Malaysia and make it big outside..then only come back and play it on radio.

We've seen it with Guy Sebastian and Che'nelle. They migrate and make it big and here comes our local radios in line to play their songs. It doesn't matter if the artiste spent one hour here or a week, but as long as the artiste migarates and make it big...here comes the Anak Malaysia tag! BULLSHIT!!

From the way I see it, our musicians can kiss the dream of making it big locally goodbye, until we can make less of a mockery of Akademi Fantasia and promote really talented musicians. Thank God for youtube...

How About Us?

OK..I did some checking up and I found out that about 40% of the Klang Valley working class people who between 25-65 indulge in maybe once a fortnight or more at the local pub. May it be from listening to the Os Pombos in Ol' Skool Bistro on Fridays or the Zarzadias Brothers at Backyard Pub on Thursdays...heck come check us, Blister, out at Backyard Pub every Saturday in May (cheap publicity...haha), one question lingers...what lies for the future of the musicians?

We all got our EPF or government pension or some other pension plan, basically something to sustain us in our later years...the musicians, well they don't have an EPF deduction! These are the same people who go on night after night giving us songs as we sip or gulp our larger. No, I'm not ranting out at the people, nor am I ranting out at the pubs. All I propose is system where musicians are able to taste the long term joys of an EPF payout!

Why aren't musicians eligible?

• They are part-time employees at a certain pub depending on the duration of their contract.
• Pubs rotate the talent from time to time.
• Probably because it'll be too "leceh" to go back and forth to the EPF office for the paperwork.

Utter nonsense! Here's what should be done (credit to Mr Jude Singho):

• Form a body which will contribute directly to the EPF
• The musicians and pubs register themselves with the Body with a small fee(be realistic..nothing is free)
• The Body manages the EPF accounts of the musicians and pubs
• The Body contributes to the EPF every month from the money of the musicians and pubs
• When a band retires from the scene, the Body cmakes a withdrawal

Simple!